A Multicultural, Generic Holiday Greeting with DIY Legal Disclaimer
Posted 18 Dec, 2007 under Culture by Chris Baskind
It’s not as if Christmas is the only holiday in December. There’s Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Yule, and Festivus. Zen Buddhists celebrate Bodhi Day on December 7th. Smaller festivals coincide with the winter solstice around the globe.
While most reasonable people aren’t offended by greeting for holidays they don’t celebrate, one can’t be too careful in extending seasonal cheer. These are litigious times.
That fact hasn’t escaped the notice of Peter and Scott, the guys behind the website Apple Zombies. In addition to their obsessive preoccupation with all things Apple and undead, the pair both happen to be attorneys. So when it came time to wish their legions of readers many happy returns, they wisely covered their asses.
We’ve secured permission to adapt their holiday greeting — and its lawyerly disclaimer — for general use. So you haven’t sent out your Christmas cards yet? That’s probably a good thing. Just fill in your local legal venue in the boldface, bracketed sections below. Then cut and paste this baby into a fax, note, or email. You’re all set. Here’s wishing you an appropriately multicultural, legally prudent season of your choice.
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Happy Holidays!
This statement of good wishes (”Greeting”) from me (”Sender”) is intended to be generic in nature. “Holiday” is intentionally left an undefined term. This holiday may include, but not be limited to, Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, New Year’s Day, Saturnalia, or even Elvis’ Birthday (”Elvis” is a registered trademark of Elvis Presley Enterprises, Memphis, TN). Further, the recipient of this greeting (”Receiver”), may insert his or her own holiday into this Greeting, either explicitly or implicitly, or no holiday at all, if he or she chooses. If Receiver celebrates no holidays during the intended period of Greeting, assumed to be roughly mid-December, 2007 through the first week in January, 2008 (”Greeting Period”), he or she may consider Greeting to be merely general, and a simple wish of good feelings and joy, suitable for any time of year, or no time at all.
Greeting should in no way be construed to guarantee or warrant happiness or other good feelings during Greeting Period, or warrant or guarantee an acceptable holiday. By accepting Greeting, Receiver expressly agrees that he or she assumes the risk for his or her own holiday. Receiver will hold Sender harmless should Receiver’s expectations for Greeting Period and wishes contained herein not coincide.
Greeting is at all times subject to withdrawal by Sender, and it may be canceled or modified at any time, without notice to Receiver. In the event of cancellation, Receiver shall receive no credit or proration for any time left in Greeting Period. Greeting is not intended to be transferable, and has no cash value. Under no circumstances may Receiver in any way alter Greeting, or publish Greeting directly or indirectly without express written permission of Sender. Permission may be withheld for any reason within the sole discretion of Sender, with no rule of reasonableness.
Should Receiver not accept the terms of Greeting listed above, no rights or benefits related to Greeting will accrue.
Should a dispute arise from Greeting, Receiver agrees that jurisdiction and venue will be in the courts of [your local jurisdiction]. Sender and Receiver agree that personal jurisdiction will lie in those courts, regardless of the location of either party. Greeting will be construed under the laws of [your local jurisdiction], without regard to Choice of Law or Renvoy.
Link: Apple Zombies
2 Responses to “A Multicultural, Generic Holiday Greeting with DIY Legal Disclaimer”
snarfd will never publish or share your address.
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Snarf the Feed
Chris, your sentiments are very sweet.
We’re wishing Happy Holidays to you and yours as well!
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